Oh, the horror...

So, about 8:00pm yesterday evening, I thought, "wow, my skin is cleaning up and while itching, it's not too bad." Well, about 8:30pm, I started to get a lot more itchy and I could not figure out what was happening. Unable to sleep, while medicated, and with the welts returning bigger than before and in new locations. When I checked myself at 3:00am, I had hives all over my face and my left eye was swollen. Okay, so I can handle itching and painful welts but when my hands and feet feel like they are going to explode and the medications are not helping -and- my feel is starting to swell, I throw in the towel.

About 3:45am, we (Rob and myself) arrive at the local ER, less than a mile away. It was quiet and I was the only other visible patient. Well, after some stronger meds and iv fluids, I was released. I was able to sleep for four hours in a row whereas for the past three nights, I was not really sleeping. The hives are almost all gone -- my eyess are still swollen and hips are still itchy with welts. Unfortunately, my lab work came back clean and we do not know what caused or is causing this. I am still on strong medications and am worried that after my four day treatment, it will come back.

You know what to do? Besides having a sense of humor and joking about being allergic to pregnancy? You keep a journal of everything you ingest or inhale. That's about it. There is no scratch test or other diagnostic tests - we have done them all.

Anyway, Rob was great, making inappropriate comments and jokes while we in the ER; a truly supportive partner and friend, I was thankful to have him there while I also wished that he were sleeping up for the rest of the day.

I've got hives! (Oh, my friend had that once, it's when you get a rash on your ...)

So, I was officially diagnosed with hives. My ob-gyn office does not seem to care unless it's Connie who answers the phone. Love it! Anyway, right now, I'm taking three different meds, debating an oatmeal or baking soda bath, and removing tomatoes from my diet. It's so much fun!
I have never had hives before and it stinks. I woke up this morning and they were worse than yesterday. The most annoying thing, besides the constant itching, is the fact that my hands and feet are swollen with welts. It hurts. If this is something that I have to deal with until delivery, I am going to need a lot of help.

How about an Allergic Reaction? Anything else?

So, late last night, I woke up with my elbows and buttocks itching (I know -- sounds fantastic, right?). I went into the bathroom and realized that other parts of my body, such as my hips, knees, and hands were covered with huge, red, itchy, welts. Sounds like fun, right? Luckily, I am catching up on my reading, so I know that benadryl is not harmful during pregnancy. It is probably not great, either but I was not sleeping and these welts were spreading before my eyes. I quickly tried to think of anything out of the ordinary that I touched or rolled around in yesterday. Nothing. What did I do next?

I woke Rob up. Yup, that is right. I was hesitant to do so because I figured that with this whole pregnancy, I have to be careful, I do not want him running errands for me at 4 in the morning unless I really cannot do it. I think that I will save up my earned-errands credits so that as the pregnancy progresses, I might be able to get more favors. So, I showed him what was going on and told him that I was going to Walgreens. He asked what he could do and I said, "go to sleep." Aren't I great?

Anyway, now, it's morning, the benadryl does not seem to be working and I am all out of the fresh tube of hydrocortisone that I purchased a mere 7 hours ago. I have a doctor's appointment later today and I am trying not to itch. Luckily, I have not had many pregnancy symptoms today. I am thankful for that because if I had to nauseous and itchy, I just do not know how I would deal with it.

I still have not figured it out...

I still have good days and bad days... physically, that is. I've been trying to walk around while I do errands and stuff; other days, I go to the gym. On those "gym" days, I keep it light but end up sleeping. Today, I fell asleep on the bathroom floor. The tiles were cold and it's still hot in Denver and my condo. I await my first prenatal check-up to see what kind of exercises and activities, I should and should not be doing.

Emotionally, the hormonal-ness, seems to have even-ed out, but I am also not holding my breath either. Every day is a new adventure! Also, the weird pregnancy dreams are in full effect. They are just bizarre. It was suggested that I keep a dream journal but I have not done that yet. This morning, I woke up confused because my many dreams actually involved Rob, so it's was super bizarre.

Like, I said, I still have not figured out a pattern and am hoping to find one sooner rather than later.

Oh, my first prenatal check-up/ultrasound is August 14th.

Week 7

What changes are occurring with my body?
I have gained a couple of pounds, but I do not think that it is too noticeable. My hips are wider and the weight that I have gained is mainly in my lower abdomin and upper thighs. My boobs are still bigger. Apparently, since I have gotten "them" so early, they are here to stay, even after the baby is born.

What is happening with your baby?
At this point every essential organ has begun to form in the embryo's tiny body. The hair and nipple follicles are forming, and the eyelids and tongue have begun formation. The elbows and toes are more visible as the trunk begins to straighten out.
Your baby is approximately ¾ of an inch long by the end of this week and weighs less than an aspirin.*

Day 1: Nausea

So, it finally hit ... nausea. I think that I would much rather throw up than have nausea. I know, I know - it sounds awful and gross, right? Well, for women who have experienced it or men who have witnessed their wives, girlfriends, lovers, go through this, they would wish the same.

I have not tried the classic solution for nausea: saltines. I will definitely be trying them in the future. For about 24 hours straight, I felt dizzy and had that lump in the back of my throat.

Emotionally, it has gotten a lot better. I only cry at appropriate times, unlike when I was watching a comedy and could not stop crying (for no reason).

It's Official - Week 6 has begun

So, I had a couple of "good" days where my energy level was decent and I did not have to nor did I feel like napping. I even went to the gym for some "moderate" exercise. Yeah. Although, I did go to Target and buy an air conditioner. Who knew that 90 degrees was the norm for Denver?

I've talked with my Dean at the business school and I have, essentially, three options:
1. Press on with school -- go as far as I can and then do the make up work (an estimated 7 weeks, I'm presuming).
2. Go for the first semester but defer the second until January 2009.
3. Defer for the entire year.

I have been looking for jobs but the thought of not starting school is really depressing. I could look past these months of unemployment because I have been working on school stuff, but if now, I cannot or should not go to school, what should I do? Needless to say, I am waiting to talk to Rob about this stuff as he is up in the mountains and thus unreachable for the week.

Other things going on in my life? I have been doing a lot of reflection, looking for 2-3 bedroom places in the area, and trying not to just run away from it all given all the craziness that is happening at once. But, you know what? God would not give it to me, unless He thought that I could not handle it.

What's happening to the baby in week 6?
The formations of the lungs, jaw, nose, and palate have begun. The hand and feet buds have webbed-like structures that will become the fingers and toes. The brain is continuing to form into its complex parts. A vaginal ultrasound could detect an audible heartbeat at this time.
Lenses of the eyes appear - If you could catch a glimpse inside, you would notice your baby's appearance becoming increasing like a newborn's (and less like some weird science experiment). Nostrils are formed and the intestines grow.

If I Had a "Real" Job

So, if I had to get up every morning at 7am and then go to work, I do not think that I could do it. I feel tired most of the day, that is, until it is time to go to bed. God bless the pregnant women who do that. I know that I would somehow find the energy to, if I were one of them but I am not. I get to do most of my work from home and whenever I feel like it... 2am, 2pm, etc. As it stands, I get most of my energy for the day about 8pm at night! What the heck? Most of the time, I just want to lie down and rest - if I fall asleep in the process, so be it! About an hour after I get up, I want to go back to bed. Any plans before 10am should just be forgotten about.

And, so I know that it's summer but really, am I supposed to be this hot and tired? I feel like in addition to the heat that the sun is creating, I am also creating some heat of my own. I feel like I have always got a low-grade fever or something. My forehead is always warm and I am never cold. This is important because "before," I was the person that was always cold. I could be in pants and a long-sleeve tee in 70 degree weather and be cold. That person is gone. I do not have central A/C but, thankfully, Rob has a window unit in his bedroom - the temperature? 68 degrees... for now.

I hear, from the one book that I've read, that this is supposed to go away but that it returns in the third trimester. At least it will be winter by then.

Are you kidding?

So that was really my response when she told me.  After three confirmations, I was confident she wasn't kidding.  It didn't take too long for me to soak it all in and realize that I was very happy to be having a child with the woman that I love.  Excited and scared would also be an understatement.  A little hung over too, but that's what happens when you celebrate too much!

July 12, 2007: Reality?

So, I'm unemployed and without proper health insurance, but I'm going to have a baby, so everything will be okay, right? Needless to say, I have an appointment with the people at Medicaid. I should have no problems there and I was actually quite impressed with their website. It's near to my home and offers many classes and birthing options... Yikes, that part is going to hurt. A lot.

As my best friend Lauren said, "one day at a time." She's right. Besides, sometime yesterday afternoon, I achieved some sort of peace. Meanwhile, Rob achieved a certain level of drunkenness, with my permission, and he decided that he was really, really, really, really, happy. You get the idea; it's proof that his sperm work.

Ironically, my friend, Kief's status message was: Hot people get together and make little hot pockets. Is that weird or what? I have only told one other person and do not know when I am going to tell my family. I will probably wait until after my cousin's wedding in August. I don't want to be a topic of discussion. Rob will probably tell his family and best friend this week.

Meanwhile, I am trying to be healthy and stay active, though it's hard because I'm just tired, seemingly all the time. I'm hoping that this is not just psychological because that would be a true bummer. I want to be active; I am tired of being sleepy. I got winded climbing a flight of stairs today! I guess that this is better than morning sickness, right? Knock on wood!

July 11, 2007: A routine visit to the doctor?

So, after a week on the Colorado River with friends, I returned to Denver. I was expecting my "friend" to make a visit during my vacation and was thrilled when she was delayed and did not make her presence known during my trip. Anyway, I had been late before; I was never what you would call "regular," in that department. So, when I was going in for a regular check-up, I did not think anything of asking them to also do a pregnancy test, in addition to my other tests. Considering that would trump pretty much anything, my doctor wanted to do that first before any other tests. Although I peed in the cup and knew that I was seven days late, I still did not think it was going to be positive.

About ten minutes after peeing into a cup, Beth, super-nice health care administrator, came in and said, matter-of-factly, that "the pregnancy test came back positive." I cried at first, but only a little - three, four tears at most. She asked if I need a minute and, of course, I didn't. Nor, did I need to call anyone, I was pregnant, not going to die. Beth continues with her talk and when she started handed me pamphlets and talking about my pregnancy, I began to laugh. I could not help it.

So, I then continued with my check-up, now armed with much more knowledge than I intended. I called Rob; luckily, he was home and I was about five minutes away. When I arrived home, starving because I spent about three hours at the doctor's, I started making my lunch while he worked on a presentation. While my lunch was heating up in the microwave, I nonchalantly said, March 13th. He must not have heard me - a common occurrence in our house - so I repeated myself. March 13th. He said, "what's March 13th?" I said, "that's the day our baby will be born."

I wasn't nervous or scared telling him. He did not react. It did not sink in. He was seated at his desk and he was just looking at me. Eventually, he said, "what?" I repeated myself and he reached his arms out for a hug... I made him get out of the chair and then we had a super long embrace.

It was not something that we had planned just yet, but we knew that we wanted kids. Apparently, God and this kid had other plans and decided that sooner rather than later would work for us. I know that I am excited (and scared) and that Rob is happy.